About
This blog is about being a mental patient at the Center for Intensive Treatment of Personality Disorders, CITPD or “the program” for short, at St. Luke’s-Roosevelt Hospital in New York City. The “Marsha” in the blog’s title refers to Marsha Linehan who invented Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, which CITPD’s treatment for borderline personality disorder is based on.
Disclaimers
– For obvious privacy reasons, all names will be pseudonyms.
– I am writing from the perspective of a Sociology major who is deeply skeptical of psychology (as an institution and as an academic field). This is not at all to say that I don’t believe in the existence of mental illness, or that I don’t believe in its treatment. But I do feel that the way psychology is taught and practiced promotes an existing stigma towards mental illness/patients.
Some Important Background
– Part of why I want to write this blog is to be critical of and question the characterization of Borderline Personality Disorder, including what is written in the DSM-IV. According to the DSM-IV, Borderline Personality Disorder is:
A pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image, and affects, and marked impulsivity beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:
1. frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment. Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in Criterion 5.
2. a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation.
3. identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self.
4. impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating). Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in Criterion 5.
5. recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior
6. affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days).
7. chronic feelings of emptiness
8. inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights)
9. transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms
– “The Center for Intensive Treatment of Personality Disorders (CITPD) offers specialized, intensive ambulatory treatment for persons diagnosed with a Personality Disorder or some of its symptoms.” This is an outpatient treatment program that for each patient runs for 5 days a week for 6 months.
Borderline Schmorderline 
April 5, 2012 at 3:48 pm
Did you complete the program? Do you recommend it?
April 5, 2012 at 5:43 pm
Yes, I completed it and I do recommend it. I think there are a couple of issues with the staff not always being the most respectful to folks, not necessarily disrespectful or inappropriate in any way, but in the sense that they spoke to you sometimes like a “patient” rather than like a regular person. This is probably worse at a lot of other places though. Also it matters A LOT who your individual therapist is. If you get stuck with someone who is not helpful, the program can be kinda shitty.
April 9, 2012 at 10:10 am
Thank you for your reply. Would it be ok to contact you through email with a few more questions?
April 9, 2012 at 12:55 pm
Yeah sure.
September 29, 2013 at 8:58 pm
Hi there! I am presently a patient at CITPD at Roosevelt Hospital. I am very interested in this blog. I will continue reading. Thxs. I completed the program in 2001 and again in 2004. It was under Director Christine Foertche, with the most skillful therapists that worked there; among them my beloved Carrie Diamond, Julie Satz, Adrian, Katie Gompers, Kathyrn Panos, Susan Schack…and it was the best DBT program in NYC. However, my recent experience after just a week at CITPD, is not at all what I expected. The cohesive mess of the treatment team does not seem apparent to me. I am on the verge of quitting the program. I am in dire need of finding a safe welcoming place, where my emotional needs can be addressed with my assigned therapist before I am challenged to function completely on my own.
December 12, 2013 at 3:18 am
Are you in the am or pm? I am currently attending now. I was also in the program 2001 and 2003 with the exact same therapist.
April 9, 2012 at 9:44 pm
Could you send me an email at anasell20@gmail.com? Thanks!
January 13, 2013 at 8:23 am
I am at a loss with this program
April 19, 2013 at 6:46 am
can i have your email address to ask you a few questions about the program
October 22, 2013 at 5:41 am
citpd is losing many qualified therapist due to budget cuts. Yes I agree the program is a mess. they have clearly indicated that they don’t care
April 3, 2015 at 6:52 pm
I was in St Luke’s-Roosevelt CITPD Program in 2008; I attended the AM program followed by the PM program (a total of six months). I found the program helpful for the mere fact that I was such a total emotional wreck that attending the full schedule occupied my mind. The program is where I first experienced Creative Arts Therapy which I thoroughly enjoyed …. so much so that I later researched the qualifications required to become an arts therapist. I still struggling with the debilitating depression associated with BPD. However I’ve been able to participating in a graduate program and will be graduating Sunday, May 17th, 2015 from Hofstra University with an M.A. in Creative Arts Therapy. Have no idea of what is next ………… !
April 21, 2016 at 5:14 pm
I’m considering attending this program since 2 therapists have already strongly recommended it to me. What were the times of the sessions? When did the AM session run and when did the PM session run?
April 7, 2015 at 6:15 pm
Congratulations! Just curious, did you work with Adrienne? I was in that program back in 2002 pm and 2003 am. The program was completely different. We were there from 1pm to 4pm 3 groups a day. I was back at the program in September of 2014 until July 2014 almost a year in the am track. I didn’t finish the program so hopefully I can go back, it really did help. The therapist were different and the program had another vibe to it back in the early 2000. 2003 was the first year that “Drew” started and everything went to shit hole.
May 26, 2016 at 3:38 pm
Hi, thanks for this blog.. I am wondering what it is like there today since I feel I am being made to go there by my therapist, psychiatrist and the “team” at Gouverneur Hospital at the behavioral clinic in lower Manhattan.. I am not too kneen on the idea especially since I feel like I am being kicked out of where I presently go for my therapy treatments. In fact the more it’s talked about the more turned off I get about attending there… As a patient I feel I have rights to have say in my treatment plan and I’d rather stay where I have been attending… Besides there is DBT groups at Gouverneur Hospital but probably not as “intenseive” at Saint Luke’s. Reading about the staff also drives me to steer farther away from wanting to go. I was resently in inpatient at a psychatric hospital and had a bad experience and do not wish to be in any type of environment like that. I think it’s disgusting how people especially with BPD get so stigmatized. I feel like my therapist and the “team” just doesn’t want to work with me anymore because they find me “too difficult to work with.” Any response would be appreciated. Thank you..
May 28, 2016 at 12:45 pm
Hi Pamela, I’m not sure what it’s like now; it’s been years since I completed the program. I would say that if you find a structured routine helpful and would benefit from classes and workshops in group settings, you may find ways to get something out of it. I feel like I also learned a lot about myself by interacting with my peers there. Pretty sure that either way, personality disorders are stigmatized even in programs meant to address them, so your experiences with being considered “difficult” versus still in search of treatment that works for you will still likely stand at St Luke’s. But it’s up to you, especially since you seem to already have something that you are currently comfortable with.
November 12, 2017 at 11:47 pm
It’s a horror show.
January 20, 2018 at 12:19 am
I go here and I am about to leave because although I was made to believe that they care care about me?They don’t and they are VERY contradicting. Talking about out of Andrews mouth they are open during rain AND/OR snow storms….hurricanes….blackouts!!!!!I mean how are you open during a blackout. MOST the trains lights in the street are shut down and off .They don’t even like to apologize when they made you upset!!!! I’ve been there because things in me are changing. I may not make it to next month. I am with the review before mine????Take that advice DON’T GO HERE!!!!!
April 11, 2018 at 11:48 pm
Hi Kayla,
I was accosted into the program but was ill and couldn’t make i there my first day. I have left several messages with the therapist that I have been assigned to and the main number for the program so that I may reschedule and they haven’t responded at all. Is the staff there unresponsive in general?
Thanks,
MS
May 10, 2018 at 3:45 am
Hi there! Is this blog still active. I was lately thinking a lot about my days at CITPD particularly bc I just heard that someone from my group past away. I was there in 2009-2010. My therapists were Adrienne, Josh and Peter. I am actually doing some writing about the breakdown that I had that landed me there and sent me “down the rabbit hole”. I’d love to connect with anybody who attended the program to both connect and help jog my memory about some of the specifics. Hit me up!
May 10, 2018 at 9:48 am
we may know each other. if you reply with your email address, i won’t approve the comment (it won’t be public) and i’ll email you.
October 16, 2018 at 2:21 pm
hey there! i’ve gone before (graduated in 2015, just one month shy of a year spent there) and am in the process of re-entering now… (october/november of 2018) would love to talk with you. (or anyone who’s had some experience with CITPD, for that matter)
i’m leaving my e-mail in this comment for whoever wants to reach out to talk about BPD, but more specifically about our experiences at CITPD. (acrosstheseveralseas@gmail.com)
January 15, 2019 at 11:43 pm
As a patient who is in the process of leaving, I will want to leave a comment on this. CITPD can be good; a lot of the patients there mean well, and are good company. However, perhaps as a predictable aspect of therapy, many people in group have issues around aggression and violence. Therapists are not well trained to address this, or at least to channel it into a productive outcome. I ended up dealing with being told that I needed to kill myself or that I was a bitch who should die/deserved to be slapped/stomped on, throughout multiple weeks at the program. I was discouraged for close to three months in my individual sessions from ever asking them why they felt this way, or trying to come to a resolution – told that the only possible outcome for me could be further victimization. It was impressed on me that I did not understand my own personality well enough to be able to navigate these issues, and should not try. As a very eager student, I complied only to find the verbal aggression growing worse week after week. I was promised an explanation (in terms of a diagnosis) for the miscommunications. Part of my eagerness to continue was my therapist’s assurance that my past abuse could be explained in part by these current experiences – that I could own, understand, and change what made these things happen with her help. After three months of nearly constant suicidal ideations, multiple overdoses, and two hospitalizations, I demanded to know what she felt I was doing wrong, and she simply replied, people become provoked by you to hurt you. I can not put my finger on why. As one of the posters above commented, this is very much a horror show. There is a lack of effort on the part of providers, relative to the amount of real risk and effort they demand of patients. In my case, it was very harmful. I think whatever CITPD is doing is quite deviant from a common sense approach. It is hard to know exactly why situations like this happen (as I am sure they do, other than my isolated case) but it seems to be reflective of larger issues. This is not to say the program is unpleasant or harmful for everyone – lots of people do like it.
January 21, 2020 at 5:28 pm
A year has passed since the previous comment. I am considering this treatment program. Is this blog dormant? I am 55 years old. I have been in treatment with psychoactive medications for thirty years and talk therapy for twenty years. I have completed one round of DBT. Do you recall persons around my age in the group sessions? I imagine the cost of a six-month cycle to be 15 or 20… or 30? thousand dollars. I know policies and coverage varies greatly, but it would be encouraging if any of you were able to offset some fraction of the cost with your medical insurance. Are there sessions for spouse/family of the primary patient? Are planned absences, for example, annual vacation with my husband, allowed? Does one join a cycle/group already in progress? Thank you.
January 22, 2020 at 12:13 pm
Hi Eliza, the blog itself is dormant, but comments still come in every once in a while and I still approve/respond to them. When I was in CITPD, the age range was pretty varied, like probably from ~19 to late 60s. I’m not sure about what cost was because for me, it was covered by medicaid, which is a positive sign for whether they take insurance I think. During that time, there were no sessions for spouse/families and no planned absences allowed. They were very strict about scheduling, including lateness, etc. And yes, you would join a group already in progress. “Graduations” happen throughout the time that you’re there.